So, while you were spending the last of your summer days frolicking on a beach somewhere, something major went down on the hot streets of the LES. Yes, the long-anticipated arrival of Bia Garden (or, for those who don't speak Vietnamese, "Beer Garden") has had every nightlife and food blog in the city hyperventilating since late July.  Now that it’s open, we knew just a solitary review wouldn’t do. Instead, we sent six different people (a barfly, an ad exec, a foodie, a student, the Professor and Marianne) to go have a “bia” and write down their impressions of the place. After all, as they saying goes, one man’s Poisson (Rouge) is another man’s Tea(ny)...will Bia Garden be your kind of place?

MARIANNE CAMARDA, Ad Exec
Age: late ‘30s
Usually seen at: Milk & Honey

Okay, here’s what you do. Drag someone’s ass over to the LES. Watch ‘em get annoyed at the grimy basement storefront. Trek through the cramped, beer bottle-lined tunnel. Kafka-esque, but that’s half the charm. The other half: a serene, tree-lined garden that’s perfect first dates. Especially if you like to torture your first dates a little first.

MEGAN GARWOOD, Art Enthusiast
Age: 23
Usually seen at: The Jane Hotel Bar

Another Manhattan backroom bar? And you have to enter through a kitchen fridge? But there IS a light at the end of this dim tunnel. Because I have a penchant for noticing aesthetic delights, I can safetly say that Bia has one up on its LES opponents: a beautiful open garden space without pretension.

LINCOLN CHINNERY, Old School Barfly
Age: 40
Usually seen at: Sunita

Once you reach the back (through a set of walk-in freezer doors) you can get Asian beers like Tiger and Sapporo by the pack (six, 12 or 24) in buckets of ice. In theory, Bia works, but it seems a less like a beer garden than an unfinished restaurant—the garden needs a lot of work. My company should put in a bid. Hell, I saw overhead lights powered by 99-cent store extension cords.  

I spend most of my weekends in grimy college bars—and many weeknights too (sorry Mom). So, I’m happy to finally end up at a place that doesn’t look, feel, and smell like low tide. It was hard to pull my friends away from yet another night of beer pong, but ultimately they were all content to be chlling outside. I was also surprised to pay so little for beer in a bucket (and not have the beer be Natty Light). 

ANNE JONES, Foodie
Age: late ‘20s
Usually seen at: The Rusty Knot

Above all else, I was excited for the frog soup. Those little Kermits don't offer much meat (what did Miss Piggy see in him?) but what little it yields is juicy and delicious. And no, it doesn’t taste like chicken. 




CHRISTOPHER GOLDBERG, Media Professional
Age: 30
Usually seen at: Verlaine

Finally, a beer garden for those of us with no interest in schnitzel!  Once I finally stepped through the freezer doors though, I was a little underwhelmed—this joint is more like a bia back porch. Plus, you should probably stick to the simple food stuff. I got buzzed, ordered curry frog and almost choked on amphibian bone. (Ed: You're lucky we already made the Miss Piggy joke).

THE VERDICT:  Frog bones, first dates, freezers and extension cords?  Is this a beer garden or Saw VI?  Those sixers must have gone down easy.  Bia Garden, 154 Orchard St., @ Rivington St., LES, 212.780.0010

Even if you went to Ultra every single weekend once upon a time, you’ll scarcely recognize anything about La Pomme. Sure, from what we've seen, it looks like it's going to be swank and stunning place—just get an eyeful of celebrity photographer Fadil Berisha’s 20-foot murals (one of which is pictured above) for proof. But don’t let the air of sophistication fool you; there will be some seriously subversive (and debauched) design elements at work here. Seek ‘em out by taking a good close look at your surroundings—from lamps to wallpaper—in the scant sober time available before you start grinding away.

More newness: Both the VIPs and DJs will at last be liberated from Ultra’s lofty second-floor hideaways. The world-class line-up of turntabilists will spin their magic from a booth in the thick of the bumping crowd, as VIPs take an exposed staircase to an open elevated platform, to see and be seen. And even if you’re not quite that up in the club, the modular banquettes and three elevated light-up dance platforms will have you in the middle of the action, no matter how (un)important you are. Scent machines (!), a snow machine (!!), seasonal cocktails and a 100-foot seamless video wall are all on hand to toy with all your senses, giving La Pomme an ever-changing vibe, night after night. This is a place that will thrive on surprises and will stay fresh long after the doors have opened.

Speaking of which, La Pomme debuts Monday, September 7th for a series of private events, and the open-to-the-public lines start forming Thursday, September 17th. Coming hot on the heels of Fashion Week and the VMAs, the door is going to be hella tight, so dress to impress. And, yes, there will be table service...you think that massive silver ceiling installation paid for its self? In short, it’s going to be the kind of party palace The Big Apple—or in this case, “La Grand Pomme” —is internationally renowned for.

So, how you like them apples?