If your spring fling still hasn’t sprung, then make like a cougar and take matters into your own handcuffs. There are plenty of places where you can get sex in the city, and some of them aren't as underground as you might think. Forget the usual date spots: Use pick up lines like “spank me” instead of “call me” at these bars and clubs, and if your mate doesn’t catch the hint, maybe it’s time to direct him to the G train instead of the G-spot.
Angels & Kings
500 E 11th St. (Aves. A & B)
East Village 212.254.4090
If it wasn’t for Pete Wentz’s honest dreams to open a place where people could
boink in the bathroom, this East Village emo-owned bar wouldn’t have made the cut. But Wentz knows that everyone needs a mildly divey neighborhood spot where you can use that condom in your wallet. Say what you want, but we saw the pics of Pete’s peter, and we’d duck in the loo for a quickie.
Byte at The Delancey
168 Delancey (Clinton & Attorney Sts.)
Lower East Side 212.254.9920
The Delancey is a good bar to go to in a t-shirt and jeans, so imagine the fun when you’re wearing thigh-high boots and a PVC tube top. Oh, and someone’s pouring hot wax on your naked skin. Once a month, this multi-level bar ushers out the prudes for the night and parties with
Byte, New York’s fetish-wearing, go-go dancing, spank-happy partiers. Make your way to the indoor garden on the top floor, where leafy tropical plants create plenty of hidden corners for impromptu action.
Pink Elephant
527 W. 27th St. (10th & 11th Aves.)
Chelsea 212.463.0000
Make it past the velvet door at this exclusive club, and you’re rewarded with bursts of pheromone-laced scents in your face. This is where beautiful people flock, and the eye candy mixing your drinks behind the bar is usually pretty good, too. Get a good buzz on, and you and your date will be dancing among the sexy crowd in no time. No room for modesty here—when the scene is this hot and bothered, anything goes.
Paddles
250 W. 26th St. (7th & 8th Aves.)
Cheslea 212.366.9339
Touted as the “friendly S&M club,” this is the best place to bend over and take it—or give it—no matter what your experience level with S&M is. Sadist? Submissive? Top? Bottom? It’s all here in this well-stocked dungeon open Friday and Saturday nights and for Hump Day Paddle Play on Wednesday nights.
Uncle Ming’s
225 Ave. B, 2nd Fl. (13th & 14th Sts.)
Alphabet City 212.979.8506
You wouldn’t want to take a black light to this sinful den of a bar—it’s seen its share of spills and scandal. Old school animated porn flashes behind the bar while moans are broadcast in the bathrooms. So it’s no surprise that this is where the latex-clad gather monthly for the
Baroness’s Fetish Retinue Party.
Room Service
35 E. 21st St. (Park & 5th Aves.)
Flatiron 212.254.5709
Next door to Ten’s strip club, this swanky lounge is a mecca for college students and a Euro crowd, but if you’re willing to spring for bottle service, isolate yourself with your sweetie in one of 13 VIP rooms. Private booths hidden by curtains are set up like hotel boudoirs, complete with flatscreen TVs, mini fridges, and drawers stocked with condoms and mouthwash. If you do decide to get frisky here, better make it a quickie—the curtains are sheer, so you might attract a voyeur or two. Then again, isn’t that part of the fun?
~ Lisa Raphael
