How Long Should You Wait to Date After a Break-up?

They say it takes half the time you dated someone to get over them. Having said that, it doesn’t mean you should be sitting around watching The Bachelor while waiting on your Domino’s delivery guy to come in the meantime. -Allison Chase



Dating after a break-up is tricky. There are three people involved who you have to consider: you, your ex, and the new guy.

First off, you have to make sure you are ready. If not, you will end up crying on the first date and won’t be able to talk about anything else other than your ex-boyfriend. Dating too soon will just make you feel worse. On the flip side, you have to be sympathetic with the new guy. They are clearly looking for someone stable, so if you are not ready, you are just leading them on and wasting their time.

The truth is, there is no right amount of time to start dating. We know someone who broke off a three-year long engagement and waited two weeks to start dating. For others, it takes months. It all comes down to you. All we know for sure is that to TRULY start dating, you have to be somewhat healed.

The first date you go on after a break-up is going to be weird, no matter what. You will almost feel like you are cheating. Knowing this, it’s almost good to get the first date out of the way. Try to do it with someone you find not-so-promising as to not ruin a potentially good romance along the line. And be honest. Let them know, without oversharing, your situation. This could mean anything from you telling them that you prefer to take it slow, to letting them know the break-up is still “fresh” in your mind. Again, it’s not just you in the picture; you have to be considerate of the other person.

And then there is your ex. You don’t want to hurt them and seem like you’ve moved on too fast. Put yourself in their shoes. This is not to say that you aren’t allowed to date because of this — just don’t flaunt it. Keep it to yourself. After all, the best revenge is living well.

After all this is said, it takes a while to find a good match. Just because you are now dating again doesn’t necessarily mean you will find someone whom you will click with right away. It could take years to find someone worthy of being your partner. But that’s okay. You don’t need to rush into a relationship. Being single is extremely satisfying if you let it be. You have to learn to be comfortable being by yourself before you can be with someone else.

Most importantly, have fun! Don’t put pressure on yourself. When you feel like you need to start dating again, you will. But there is no such thing as too soon. It’s all circumstantial. At the end of the day it all comes down to doing what is best for you and everyone else involved.

19 Comments

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  • Michael Kors Outlet Handbags:

    It’s really a great and helpful piece of info. I’m glad that you shared this helpful info with us. Please keep us up to date like this. Thank you for sharing.

    {Reply}
  • Alex:

    My ex of two and half years just broke up with me two days ago and I was already trying to talk to someone new. This really helped!

    {Reply}
  • Serenity:

    My ex and I were together for 4 years… I think waiting two years to date anyone might be pushing it. >.>
    But I’ll give it a couple more months, for sure.

    {Reply}
    1. Zack:

      You don’t have to wait half of the time:

      The truth is, there is no right amount of time to start dating. We know someone who broke off a three-year long engagement and waited two weeks to start dating. For others, it takes months. It all comes down to you. All we know for sure is that to TRULY start dating, you have to be somewhat healed.

      {Reply}
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  • Shenantrelle:

    I dont think you should rely on half time rule created by a character in a movie… months and even years may go by without you getting over someone. I am recently out of a relationship that for the last 6 moths put me on a emotional roller coaster and I wasnt strong enough to end it until recently. He didnt fight for me, even worse he let me go, and that killed me… well months went by and I thought I got over it… I started dating that other guy 3 weeks after the break up and he is nice and caring and makes me laugh and I love spending time with him. Until I ran into my ex today just to realize I was never over him, in fact I am still crazy in-love with him, I just buried the feelings and never allowed myself to think about him… So how who can tell how long is long enough? Is there such a thing as “never getting over someone”?

    {Reply}
  • lathi:

    I also think the half time rule works, it happened to me , is started dating right after breaking up becouse i was so hurt and guess what it didnt work i felt so bad feeling for my x for moving to soon and at the same time being smpathetic of the new current guy who seemed to be so serious

    {Reply}
  • nail:

    realy helped thanks

    {Reply}
  • jane14:

    Really good advice!! And perfect for me at this moment!

    {Reply}
  • avatar
    Carmen Adorno:

    It all depends, but whatever you do don’t sit home crying. Move on & try to stay happy enjoy the moment. Something better will come.

    {Reply}
  • avatar
    Rita:

    Good tips

    {Reply}
  • Crispy:

    nice

    {Reply}
  • Chris:

    5 minutes :)

    {Reply}
  • Christina:

    good advice

    {Reply}
  • Christina:

    The ex really shouldn’t be a thought if you’re moving on.

    {Reply}
  • Christina:

    That first date is always weird.

    {Reply}
  • Christina:

    The half time rule sometimes works: wait half the time of your total relationship–you date six months, start dating after 3….

    {Reply}
    1. dwonline:

      I just got out of a 16 year relationship (11 year marriage), and I’m almost 41…. does this mean I shouldn’t date until I’m almost 50?!???

      {Reply}
  • Christina:

    There’s something to be said for a rebound as long as he knows he is one.

    {Reply}

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