“I’m going home for the holidays and I HAVE to see my ex-boyfriend (we have mutual friends). We have unfinished business and broke up less than a year ago, so I’m afraid of saying or doing something stupid (…like hooking up with him!).
I know, I know. The easy answer here is ‘Don’t drink,’ but let’s be real. I’m going to enjoy myself and have a couple of cocktails. How do I keep myself from making a dumb mistake?!”
Mr. Loverboy Rocker SEE BIO NOW>
If anything, this seems like a perfect opportunity to have some fun over the holidays, then leave and get back to your life away from home as if nothing happened.
But, if not sleeping or hooking up with him is the best thing for your well-being, then be sure of it! Don’t go home thinking that you might make a mistake, and don’t be nervous about how you’ll react to seeing him.
Your question itself is pretty much announcing your inner-thoughts, ”Well, if I get drunk, then I might want to hook up with him.” If you don’t want to be with him, then don’t! It’s easy, even if you’re drunk. Just click that switch in your head and enlist help from your friends.
Also, don’t flirt, don’t hang out with him alone, don’t give him the eye and don’t lead him on. And, think of all the sexier men you have waiting for you once you leave! Be open and honest with him, don’t give him false impressions and be confident with your decision.
Mr. Noncommittal SEE BIO NOW>
Obviously if you make that dumb mistake, you want to make it. Don’t deny yourself a good time. Just make sure you know that it is what it is—think of it as a one-night stand with someone you’re familiar with. We all need sex, especially around holiday time. It’s the best way to work off those calories from holiday meals.
Mr. Young and in Love SEE BIO NOW>
Why would it be dumb? At the end of the day you don’t live there anymore, so if you have a bit of Xmas fun would it really be that bad? I’m sure that none of your friends would care—it’s perfectly natural to fall back to someone that you have a history with.
Mr. Loves Boys Too SEE BIO NOW>
It certainly sounds like there is still a lot of interest on both of your parts if 1) You are willing to spend time in the same room as each other and 2) You are thinking that you’ll end up sleeping together. Have you hooked up with him before after a chance meeting or visit home? Are you at a point in your post-relationship where a one-night stand is just a fling? If so, maybe a holiday hook-up isn’t such a bad idea.
But if you really don’t have any interest in hooking up, take a few simple prevention steps 1) Don’t spend time alone with him—make sure there are always other friends in the vicinity. 2) Recruit a girlfriend. Tell her to be your advocate to make sure that you don’t end up knocking boots in his bed. 3) Start a conversation with him before your second drink and tell him that you are not interested no matter what the alcohol says. 4) Take a friend with benefits along or rent a date! Good luck keeping the “Ho, Ho, Ho” out of the “HO”lidays!
GIRL TALK TIME: What do you think? Have you ever made a mistake with an ex around the holidays? What happened? What would you do in this situation?
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