Natalie1985: Why do guys date crazy women? Not to be a traitor to my sex or anything, but I just don’t get it. I was always told that being hyper clingy, reading my boyfriend’s emails and berating him for not lavishing me with constant attention was a bad thing, yet several of my guy friends are in long-term relationships with women who do just that.
Worst of all, they spend all their time complaining about how horrible their girlfriends are but they never do anything about it. WHY!
Mr. Sensitive and Scientific SEE BIO NOW>
This is fascinating to me because when I read “crazy women” I didn’t immediately think of clingy and attention-seeking. The crazy that I’m (sadly) more attracted to is at the opposite end of the spectrum, aloof and hard to catch. What you seem to be describing is insecurity. They want the guy to validate them so badly that they wind up engaging in self-sabotaging behavior, but we’re not here to debunk female behavior. The real question is: “Why do [some guys] spend all of their time complaining about how horrible their girlfriends are but never do anything about it?”
I think everyone, male and female, has at one point dated someone who they knew wasn’t right for them but stayed anyway. Perhaps they’re gluttons for punishment, but it’s more likely that it’s just easier to stay. I’ve had multiple male friends with girls (not crazy) in the last year that stayed long past the relationship should’ve been over.
But if you’re complaining about your significant other’s character (not a specific thing they did), or you have a gut feeling that they’re wrong for you, you’re not built to last. I can also say that clingy isn’t attractive in men or in women, so while I can’t fully explain why the guys are staying, I can say that your personal behavior is spot on. If you’re gonna be crazy, distant crazy is more attractive than clingy crazy.
Mr. Loves Boys Too SEE BIO NOW>
Because they are hot! It is amazing the amount of torture a guy will put himself through for a hot partner and steady sex. That aside, I’m assuming that you are not crazy and you are single—otherwise you wouldn’t care about your guy friends dating crazy women. I’ll bet you are wondering why you don’t have some poor guy to drive crazy while providing your “hotness” and steady sex, and you’ve driven some guys away by being…”crazy.”
If that is the case, then I must assure you that when someone you are interested in is clingy and needy it is “cute,” but if you are not interested in that person they are “crazy.” I once had a girl say to me, “You look great in a suit!” I thought she had lost her mind. But, I had a really cute guy use that as a pickup line and it worked very well.
On the other hand, maybe my assumption is wrong and you do have a boyfriend, in which case, he is likely out with his friends telling them how crazy you are. Either way, most relationships work the same way: you like someone 80% of the time, the other 20% you ignore them until you are at happy hour with your friends and you can complain about them. I wish you that 80% happiness!
Mr. Noncommittal SEE BIO NOW>
Why do we date crazy girls? The answer is in the bedroom. Crazy girls are notoriously better in bed and less inhibited than normal ones. The rule of thumb is this: Crazy=good to great in bed, Normal=you never know, Neurotic=lousy in bed. This rule has been tried and true for years, at least in my experience. Clingy and weird are just by products of the nutty ones.
Of course every guy wants to date the normal, cool girl that rocks like a porn star in the sack, but those finds are rare and usually get swiped up fast. The safe bet is that crazy in life means crazy in bed. It may not be what you want to hear, but ask any guy (who will tell you the truth) and there’s your answer. Charlie knows what I’m talking about.
Mr. In a Relationship SEE BIO NOW>
I think we all know at least one buddy whose behavior is exactly as described here. The thing to note is that there aren’t many girls out there checking a guy’s iPhone on the first date. These behaviors develop slowly over time, so at first many guys think it’s not worth the headache to argue about, or they might think it won’t happen again.
By the time the privacy issues get to the extreme described above, either the guy is scared he is too invested to leave the relationship or simply too lazy to do something about it. When a precedent isn’t set early as to personal privacy issues, personal space and the like, it’s really difficult to backtrack. That being said, sooner or later something will go down that’s too much, and if he has any regard for a manageable personal life, he’ll drop the chick. If he doesn’t, you probably won’t see him much anyway, so who cares!
GIRL TALK TIME: Have you ever seen this happen? Why do you think guys date “crazy” girls? Has a guy ever called you crazy? Why?
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