Everyone’s dated one—the douchebag. But what do you do when your friend is going out with a total loser? One Shecky’s Staffer went through this situation and like the Best Supporting Girlfriend (read real-life stories and VOTE NOW!) she was trying to be, she’s not sure she handled it the right way. See her story and share yours.
“My one pal started dating this really cute guy. On the surface he was cool—he seemed chill and had a good job as a teacher and a lacrosse coach. Little did we know….
The douchebaginess surfaced slowly. He would ditch her to go out boozing with his buddies frequently. She’s pretty quiet, so she just brushed it off, not wanting to seem dramatic. But the problems got worse.
He went on vacation, bought her a huge mumu-like dress and told her that it was ‘just her size.’ That’s when he started calling her fat, which is terrible no matter how much you weigh but was even more ridiculous because she was so thin. After the fat comments, my friend started eating less and lost even more weight (she got scary-skinny).
All these stories started surfacing about the douche-y dude: his nickname was Fog from smoking too much (a.k.a. he had done/was still doing a lot of drugs). Then we heard rumors about him cheating. Still, my bestie hung in there, always making excuses for his next idiot move. We kept telling her she deserved so much better and tried to intervene, but she would always go back to him.
When he started making her check in with him every hour when she spent time with the girls, I really lost it. One fun night my pal was drinking and having too much of a good time to check in ‘on time,’ so he called her ranting and raving. As she started crying, I snapped for her. I took the phone and told her boyfriend off (in a few choice words, not my finest moment). I said that he was treating her like crap (okay maybe I used a stronger adjective than that), that he wasn’t a father punishing a wayward 12-year-old daughter. Instead of calming down or just hanging up, he started screaming right back at me, calling me nasty names. I took my friend’s phone and didn’t let her answer the rest of the night (even though he called about 20 times).
Eventually she broke up with him, but not without some emotional scars I’m sure. I wish I or my friends had effectively intervened earlier. What should we have done? Is it okay to get involved with a pal’s relationship? To what extent? Was taking the phone away from her too much?”
GIRL TALK TIME: Do you think our Staffer did the right thing? Have you ever hated a friend’s boyfriend? How did you deal? When is it okay to get involved in a friend’s relationship?