So this subject kind of stinks, but it’s a necessary one. When is it the time in your relationship to take that special next step? We’re not talking moving in or marriage…we’re talking when—if ever—is it okay to talk to your significant other about farting, pooping, the works? One Staffer ponders.
“I recently had my boyfriend over for an extended period of time. After a bout of Mexican, nature was screaming, not calling to me. Armed with some lie about checking for a ‘package’ downstairs, I ran to the restroom in my building’s lobby, to, er, get down to business. I came back and he was none the wiser.
I asked a few friends: Is it ever okay to discuss bathroom issues with a dude you’re dating? My one very open friend actually bonded with her BF over their affliction with IBS (a.k.a. Irritable Bowel Syndrome), and they speak freely about their W.C. worries. Another pal shared that she was completely mortified when she accidentally farted in front of her guy. Her boyfriend, however, gave her a high five, ‘Yessss! We’re at that point in our relationship!’ he exclaimed. Confused on the issue, I surveyed the people who always know best: Shecky’s Staffers. Here’s their take.”
Staffer 1: “Regarding farting, I’ve been with my husband for seven years and we’ve never done that in front of each other. This can be very inconvenient at times. Regarding poop, we have an extra half bathroom in our apartment which seems to be the designated bathroom.”
Staffer 2: “I dated a guy for about two years in college, but we had known each other and been best friends long before that. I refused to poop at his apartment or when he was at mine. I would just sit there and whine that my stomach hurt, and he’d say, ‘Go to the bathroom!’ He didn’t care, but I was totally embarrassed. I used to tell him that I didn’t poop. Like he believed that.”
Staffer 3: “When I was first seeing my now boyfriend, I would spend the weekend at his house, and I couldn’t use the bathroom for days at a time. Feeling bloated all the time is so not sexy! As soon as we got over that li’l hump and my bathroom anxiety was cured, we were free to truly fall in love. I don’t think there is anything wrong with discussing or doing such things. It’s totally natural. If I had never gotten over my phobia I may not be here today to tell this tale!”
Staffer 4: “What’s less sexy than someone ripping one? That said, when accidents happen, it’s all about being able to laugh it off and change the subject to avoid embarrassment. As for timing, unfortunately your stomach rarely waits for an opportune moment, but it is a good litmus test of where you stand in the relationship. If you guys can giggle about it, you know you’re close enough to not let the little things bother you. If he breaks out the Febreeze, and not in a funny way…you might need to reevaluate your relationship status.”
Staffer 5: “I hate all bodily functions, so when I’m dating a guy, even if I’m comfortable with him, it’s a non-issue. I’d never want to discuss those things…with anyone! I once dated a guy who would fart in front of me daily and justify it by saying that if he did that, he must really like me. Gee, thanks.”
GIRL TALK TIME: Have you ever passed gas or pooped to your fella’s knowledge? Have you discussed it? Is this topic okay or totally off limits? Weigh in, and don’t be embarrassed. This site is No Boys Allowed so we’re sure your husbands and boyfriends aren’t taking a peek.