Boyfriend Envy
Boyfriend envy. We’re pretty sure at one point every woman has been a liiiiittle teensy bit (fine, very) jealous of her friend’s boyfriend or husband. One Staffer writes in about the time she was crushing on her best friend’s boyfriend. Read her situation and tell us if you’ve ever been stuck in this jam.
“Here’s the sitch: I’m not a bad person, I just kiiiinda envied my friend’s boyfriend once. From the second she started dating him, her BF and I got along like BFFs. He was insanely funny—something I’m a complete sucker for, but she found his sense of humor annoying and immature, shooting us dirty looks as we watched YouTube and talked sports and South Park.
He treated her well and always hung out with us, but she didn’t really seem to appreciate him, rolling her eyes when he called and complaining about their relationship. He and I always wanted to go out, encouraging my friend, his girlfriend, to play as many stupid (but fun!) drinking games as possible and head out to try new places.
He was also into music like I am. I felt like my friendship status with his girlfriend was headed to defriend town every time her boyfriend brought his iPod out and asked me what songs we should listen to, if I’d heard of some new artist, song, etc…while his girlfriend/my friend scowled in the background.
It got so bad, that at one concert we all went to (him and I naturally wanted to get as close as possible, and we were laughing and dancing like idiots) someone referred to us as ‘boyfriend-girlfriend.’ We gave each other…awkward looks, and I was thankful that my friend, his actual girlfriend, was not up front with us. I liked him because we had a lot of the same interests, but mostly I loved spending time with him because he was so energetic and fun.
I never would have done anything out of respect for my friend and their relationship, but I did kinda-sorta like him, and the whole thing kinda-sorta freaked me out. I eventually got over the boyfriend crush by taking the qualities that I liked in her man and finding my own (and 100x better!) version.”
GIRL TALK TIME: Do you know what she’s talking about? Have you ever crushed on a friend’s significant other? How did you deal?
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23 Comments
Post a CommentMe and my friends dont go have anything in commom when it comes to guys alot of them are cute but dont do anything for me where I would be jealous of what they have, besides relationships come and go so whats the point of being jealous, I’m working towards the life I want for me not their lives
I have a friend like this. Even when she has her own boyfriend, it doesn’t matter. Lately I’ve distanced myself from her because it’s annoying and on top of it she turns everything into a competition and has to “1 up” you to death.
the grass is always greener till you have to tend it yourself lol
BIG NO NO!!
Crushing on a friends man is a HUGE no no
I can relate to that…but I’ve never actually had a crush on a friend’s significant other. I can however say though that at time I’ve been jealous at how a friend’s significant other may treat them wishing that my significant other would do certain things the same.
I may have agreed that a friend’s guy was attractive or something, but never had a boyfriend crush. I dont even care to talk to a guy who even looked at one of my friends in that way nor do I think its acceptable for any of them to talk to a guy who tried to talk to me even if I wasnt interested in him. FYI: this is the main reason I dont kiss and tell. Things can get weird quick.
you are so right about that!!!!!!!!!!!
i crushed on my friend’s boyfriend, but just like Meiko said, “I know better not to be friends with boys with girlfriends”! i think he knew i liked him because every time we were alone, he’d always talk about how much he loved her. that made me know to back off! stupid me…
Never have I crushed over my friends guy even if she didn’t treat him well. It’s not a good look on a friends part.
I would never do it to a true friend. Real friend’s don’t hurt each other. Now on the other hand if she became a witch then her boyfriends a target only if he’s cute… LOL
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i like how she makes it sound like her friend was a complete and utter witch and never ever appreciated this guy, as if he was perfect.
that’s the problem with girls like this. they say, “i would never do anything out of respect for my friend,” but look at how she wrote this article? there are good and bad sides to everything, and all she wrote about were the bad parts of her friend. some “friend.”
i’m glad she found her own man and stopped lusting after her friend’s. i also hope her friend found a man who was less apt to make googly-eyes at his girlfriend’s friends.
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While we always appreciate hearing from you on Sheckys.com, your comment has been edited due to profanity. We’re keeping the new Sheckys.com a safe and respectful place for all of our girlfriends and we need you to help us reinforce that mission.
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Omg, never. All my girlfriends men are off limits. Besides I have never been attracted to any of them anyway.
I never crushed on a friends guy.. but all my friends are married to really wonderful men, and it gives me hope that there are still good men out there. It makes me want to set the bar higher for myself so I don’t settle for a guy that treats me like ish! Glad you found your own too!
Nope, haven’t ever crushed on a friends guy. She did the right thing and found her own guy in the end.
never a friend’s boyfriend …they aren’t the type i’d go for ….however i used to have a HUGE crush on this co-worker but he was married
I personally have NEVER crushed on a friends (or anyone’s for that matter) BF (not only out of respect for the other person but for myself). But I have been on the other end where females wanna crush on my man…first off, the grass always seems greener on the other side; meeting/hooking up for the first time is always good in the beginning but eventually every relationship ends up having some kind of problem…and like one poster wrote if the guy is gonna flirt with u while hooked up with someone else then realize that your NOT that special & if u do end up with the guy he’ll do it to you to! At the end of the day if u find ourself liking someone elses man then look for those same qualities in your OWN man & FALL BACK off of someone elses man…remember what goes around comes around!!!
I’ve met guys who were in relationships who I developed a crush on, but never a friend’s boyfriend (probably because my friends and I have very different tastes). I always snap out of having a crush on a taken man as I realized I could never be with a guy who flirted with me while in a relationship, it’s a two way street–if he’s flirting with you while he’s in a relationship, he’s gonna flirt with someone else while he’s with you. Total crush killer
sorry. i have never crushed a friend’s boyfriend but i’m glad that you found your version
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I was kind of in this situation in high school, I wouldn’t really say a crush though. At least on my end, but I did think he was cool and liked being around him. OK, so maybe that makes it a small crush. Long story, but he and one of my besties ended up breaking things off. Then he called my parents’ house one day (seriously no clue how he got the #!) and asked if I wanted to go out, so it was kind of the other way around. I was a serious virgin to being in a relationship, so I knew nothing of “girl code”…aka, you don’t hook up/date your friends’ exes or crushes. We dated for about a year, then went our separate ways… all in all, an interesting situation
never crushed on my friend’s boyfriend before. that sounds like a tough situation to be in but i’m glad she found her own 100x better man! i wonder if she and her friend are still good?